Today, today is a new day. It hurts a little less, but I still am raw. I still easily shed tears. There is still someone missing in my heart, as there always will be from the day we found out the baby died. It wasn't even two weeks ago, that we found out and was less than a week since I gave birth.
But today, though I was petrified yesterday I would have to go in for a DnC because I am just so paranoid that there was tissue left, due to clots yesterday, the bleeding has almost stopped. My mood is better.
I talked with the midwife, we have a plan. I will be referred to the recurrent pregnancy loss clinic. We will try and get the remains tested, no garuntees though.
I joined a bereavement group that met the day after I miscarried.
There is a memorial service for infant child and pregnancy loss at a church a couple towns away next saturday.
I SLEPT!!! I got some valerian root as nothing else I have was working. often 20mg of melitonin wasn't enough. I was getting 2-4 hours a night.
I even got a nap today.
one thing that does suck is that with my second child we got an ultrasound at almost exactly the same gestation as this baby should have been. And hormones suck i'ts the same damn ones you get full term but you dont get to bring a baby home that sucks the most.its easier to deal with them when there is a purpose.
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